The Real Quaid - Get Rad
get it here:
release date:

April 25, 2015


Get Rad

  • 1. For You It Was A Tuesday
  • 2. Palcatraz
  • 3. Going Commando
  • 4. Insurrection
  • 5. Laurels
  • 6. Johnny Wong
  • 7. Chat Roulette
  • 8. Semantics
  • 9. Moonfall
  • 10. Happy Campers
  • 11. Wrecked
  • 12. Epitome Of Hilarity
  • 13. Baby Steps

The Real Quaid's debut album! Featuring artwork based on the "cargo plane full of rubber dog shit" quote from Top Gun. Get Rad or get sad...

Mixed/Produced by Adam Shelton
Front cover artwork by Mark Bell
Back cover photo (CD version) by Mark Whateley

CD back cover:
Get Rad back cover

For You It Was A Tuesday
So there I was fourteen years old
You were the older girl that all the guys want
You put your hands down the front
So scared I pretended that I didn't notice

That's why I didn't put the controller down
Just kept on playing while you went down town
I was so scared that night
But for you it was a Tuesday

You asked if I was having fun
Timing was bad as I was fighting M Bison
We've been friends for quite a while
My heart melts when I see her smile
When she tells me about where she's been
And the problems that she has with him
They say that nice guys finish last
So I'll never get to tap that ass
I can't run, I can't escape
I am locked down here in Palcatraz

She's left me so unhappy
Can't believe that this has happened again
I should have seen the signs
But I thought she was the one for me

But then I met this other girl
And I hoped we could give it a whirl
She smiled at me and she liked my jokes
Turns out she had a bloke
Tried to convice them that it wouldn't last
Now he wants to kick my ass
I can't run, I can't escape
I am locked down here in Palcatraz!

I wish she'd see me as the true love that I know it could be
She doesn't notice and sees.... right through me
I'm all torn up every time that she hangs up the phone
She's got me wandering down the highway to the friendzone

My mother asks when I'm gonna bring a nice girl home
She doesn't realise that I'm gonna be forever alone
It will be written by my family on my tombstone
I was a wanderer on the highway to the friendzone

This unrequited love is just about to tear me apart
I should have realised this would happen right from the start
If I can't have her I'll walk down this highway alone
I'll keep on walking down the highway to the friendzone
Going Commando
Last night I had a crazy dream
It was when I fell asleep
After a night full of beer
Oh not again
It involved Arnie and Me
We walked on the beach
Everything was so sweet
Then someone took Chenny

I saw the anger and the panic in his eyes
I saw the fear explode inside of his mind
He said he needs to spend some time alone
And he will not stop until he brings Chenny home

They said that Bennett took her away
On a boat then on a plane
But he looked out of place
With his chainmail
Now we know she's afraid
If we hurry we can save
Her and everyone from his bad moustache

Flew to the island and killed Arius's men
Then we found Arius, and we shot him dead
I heard screams from the basement, and it was Chen
Bennett ambushed us, but got a pipe to the chest

Arnie told Bennett
(To let off some steam)
I guess I'm dead tired
(I'm still in this dream)
He made me breakfast, it was green beret
(Green beret)
I'll wake up knowing that I'll never be the same
They want obedience
Calling for compliance
Their autocratic powers don't mean a thing to us
We're on their blacklist
They call us anarchists
But what have we got when our human rights are dismissed?

Fascist agenda
Return to sender
Our right to freedom we won't surrender
High level corruption
Grinding poverty
We're gonna bite the hand that doesn't feed

'Cause this rebellion starts right now
We're gonna kick off this mutiny
The uprising is here
It is time for insurrection

This Revolution
Gaining momentum
This uprising is going viral
Rule with an iron fist
Exloitive politics
We're gonna riot, We need insurgency

Revolt against the system
Revolt against the lies
We don't need their authority
It's time to stand up for what's right
You've been knocked down so many times before
It's hard to pick yourself up off the floor
You've grown old and you've grown tired
You've ran out of fuel to carry on for miles

I've been in your situation many times before
I've failed to open so many closed doors
I've hated the thought to be put on the shelf
It's time to get up, stand up for your fucking self

When the skies all open up
The rain starts to pour down
Don't stand by your laurels
But take the fuckers down
Just open your eyes
And open your mind
Then happiness my friend
Is easier to find

There's more to life than these four walls
Clichéd sayings, you've heard them all before
You've realised that something's gotta change
You're pressing the buttons but you're losing the game

(It's your life!)
Learn to live by your own rules
(It's your life!)
Don't be ditacted by fools
(It's your life!)
Learn to live by your own rules
(It's your life!)
It's your fucking life!
Johnny Wong
Oh Johnny Wong yeah
Oh Johnny Wong yeah
Oh Johnny Wong I love your noodles

I love your noodles
I love your noodles
I love your noodles
And I love you
Chat Roulette
I went on the internet
On a site called Chat Roulette
I hoped to find some sweet ass tits
Oh yeah

Then what happened next
Was something I'd like to forget
There were so many dicks
Fuck no

Can't believe there would be so many dudes
Can't believe that my eyes are so abused

So if you're feeling horny and you wanna see some tits
Stop and think twice before you chat roulette

Next time I went on the net
Something happened that I didn't expect
There was this German dude
What The fuck?

He got a massive slipper
and hit himself in the nuts
I guess that's normal in Germany
Oh well

My friend from Oz
Dressed up in his girfriends clothes
He put on her underwear
Shit yeah

He pretended to be a chick
To piss off those guys whose dicks
Were there burning my eyes
Get fucked
Was she alive or was this something else?
Fuelled by hatred
Violently rejecting this so called daughter of hers

Perception without comprehension
Is a dangerous combination

With the tomb opened
She had been forced out of her resting place
So she screamed "Bastard child! You are the lie, the lie, the lie that spawned from my womb! No child of mine! No child of mine!"

Perception without comprehension
Is a dangerous combination
She can never understand why
Why she dies, she died and she will die

Now she really needs to know what she has become
If she's not of this world where did she come from?
Should she make amends with this girl tonight?
Would it free her soul? Please find out child

Perception without comprehension
Is a dangerous combination
She can never understand how
how she lives, she lived and she will live
I've got a theory that me and you could equal rad
But if the equations don't add up, me minus you equals sad

I sat next to you in physics class
Your gravity field shouldn't have let me passed
They say magnets show that opposites attract
I'd like to see how you react

The electro-magnetism between us
It is somewhat dangerous
But I know I'll be OK
Locked inside the Faraday cage around your heart

Seeing you it's like the worlds collide
And our stars align
I see my universe in your eyes
I fall for you
But does the moon also fall?

You've got me boiling
at 7800 degrees (fahrenheit)
My heart is racing like
an atom travelling (at the speed of light)

The chemistry between you and me
I wanna study your biology
And if an asteroid falls from space
you and me girl will propagate the human race
Happy Campers
So we just saw a band
And we fancied another beer
Went back to camp
It's everything I feared

Open up my tent
and all my drinks are gone
Fuck this shit
We were gonna have a beer bong

Kings Of Leon are the
Only band you came for
Won't be watching them
'Cause we think they are piss poor

Wait for you to leave
So your tent is empty
When it's all alone
It looks so easy

So I pissed in a bottle
And I threw it in your tent
I pissed up the walls
and I soaked the fuck outta your bed

We laughed at you
As you slept in the wet patch
So leave my beer alone
You bunch of indie cunts!
Hey, I saw you yesterday
You were really looking so down and out

So, I offered you my hand
And we went drinking
'Cause you’re my friend

You told me what's upset you
I cannot let it affect you
'Cause she ain't never gonna get you down
So my friend, let's get god damn (wrecked)
You said you believed her lies
And it's failing even though you try
It's time to sever every tie
Tonight's the night
So let's get fucking wrecked

Hey, now we're hungover
I make you coffee and you're throwing up

Last night, it was so awesome
We should do it more often
'Cause it was so damn fun

You told me what's upset you
I cannot let it affect you
'Cause she ain't never gonna get you down
So my friend, let's get god damn (wrecked)
They say old wounds heal with time
And nothing she'll say will ever change your mind
Arm in arm at the end of the night
We'll be singing
Let's get fucking wrecked
Epitome Of Hilarity
It's all I hear on radio and TV
It's everything that I just don't wanna be
The businessman. He owns your life if you sign on the dotted line

What's with these corporations screwing people's dreams
Creating souless music, pulling at the seams
And when I see the crowds holding up their signs
I just can't wait for the day when the music industry dies

Everyone seems to know all of their names
The mastermind. He wants you to play his games
But I ain't following the shepherd and his herd this time
Not tonight
Baby Steps
Opened up the door 'cause of incessant ringing
Thought it was the mail, was suprised to see you there
Staring right back at me

You picked a shorter straw than Warwick Davis
But you've got a haircut kinda like Bruce Willis
Well I guess that evens it out

You scream, but I've never heard you talk
You crawl, but I've never seen you walk
You lie around drinking milk all day
Your sleepless nights (they drive me insane)

I couldn't understand why I was choking
Turns out your pants were brown and rather soaking
What a lovely suprise

I don't want it to sound like I'm being dramatic
Seems like your ass was on automatic
But still I can't work it out how..

You're small, but man can you make a noise
You cry, like you do not have a choice
There's something about you that just ain't right
Do you cry 'cause you think the same?

I thought you were the little guy from Austin Powers
(I convinced myself for several hours)
I thought you looked a bit like Bilbo Baggins
(Or Schwarzeneggers brother in the movie "Twins")

You remind me of a Dwarf from World Of Warcraft
(Told my mom, but she just laughed)
You popped out of a girl that I once dated
(Why did no-one tell me that we procreated?)

She said my skills left her frustrated
(And she should have stayed home and masturbated)
She asked if we should use protection
(I thought that was a weird question)

I asked my mom, showed her your face
(Turns out you're a member of the human race)
You popped out of a girl that I was dating
(Why didn't she tell me she was ovulating?)

End backing:
You scream, but I've never heard you talk
You crawl, but I've never seen you walk
You smile, but I've never seen you dance
No shame, that you're wearing paper pants